Thursday, 3 March 2011

Charlie Sheen = HERO

Charlie Sheen is an absolute, bonafide, 100% LEGEND. That is an undeniable fact. The man is basically Robert De Niro but more fun. He's starred in some of the most hard hitting, thought provoking and dramatic movies ever made (putting in hardcore performances) as well as starring in some of the most ridiculous comedy flicks out there AND covering all the ground in between. You can take this as a salute to the man from me, not only for his outrageously under-appreciated acting skills and the fact he's starred in some of my favourite flicks EVER but also because of his bad boy, party animal lifestyle that he continues to pursue to this day despite the fact that he's well into his 40's.

Young Guns. Cracking.

Cameo in Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Legendary.

Of course, the God Body Sheen has been hitting the headlines recently for all of the 'wrong' reasons, namely his massive alcohol and drug abuse issues and his continuing rock star behaviour, i.e. trashing hotel rooms, firing guns and having three ways with porn stars (he tapped Heather Hunter back in the day - WOW). He obviously has issues and its good to see when anyone with problems recognises the fact and takes steps to get themselves back on track, but god damn it if Charlie Sheen ain't living the American Dream. Plus, regardless of all this, his net worth is apparently around the $85 million mark and probably still rising. WOW.

Platoon. Bad (Good).

Hotshots 1 & 2. Leslie Nielson's (RIP) adopted son. Massive.

And you know you've made it big time when someone out there makes an action figure of you. It's always been my dream that some company out there will make the BIG DAVE action figure some day and I'm going to cling to that hope until the day I'm ghost. I wonder if he even knows this exists.

Now, despite the tragic nature of his various problems, Sheen's popularity has, in some sort of sick way, been exponentially growing since he's been back in the papers for smashing porn chicks, sniffing rails and blazing heaters. I must admit that I have a new found respect for the man, despite all of the obvious contradictions in play. One result of his re-branding and subsequent surge in popularity has been the 'Live The Sheen Dream' website, which I urge you to visit. Click on Charlie's face and you will be presented with an endless tirade of his priceless quotations from recent times, including the claim that he has 'tiger blood pumping through his veins' and that he was born 'with the DNA of an adonis'. You couldnt make this shit up.

For example - "Good luck on your travels. You're going to need it. Badly."


Oh, and peace to my man The Ruby Kid who had this to say on Twitter earlier -

"I want @Enlish to become UK hip hop's @charliesheen. Whaddaya say, Big Dave? Up for it?"

What can I say? The man knows quality work when he sees it. From now on I will be officially known as Enlish AKA Big Dave LO, 'The Charlie Sheen Of The UK Scene'. Its a done deal. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm no slouch on the party scene (minus the porn stars, of course). Plus I'm still in my 20's, so If Big Chuck is 46 and still getting it in, I still got time to play the game.

On a lighter note, here's some of my favourite Sheen flicks that if you haven't seen, you must see.

Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Platoon, Wall Street, Young Guns, Men At Work, Navy Seals, The Rookie, Hot Shots, Hot Shots Part Deux and National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon 1 to name but a very, very small selection. Platoon is so gully.

Charlie Sheen, I salute you. Get well soon, but not too well. Holla at me, I need you to host the mixtape patna.

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